Don't mess with Jonas!

I bet after this post most people will learn to stay out of other people's businesses because if Jonas finds you stealing a glance at him, you will definately go to have your mouth super mouthwashed or your throat replaced-which am yet to hear of. Well, Jonas is the crazy dirty street guy who finds pleasure in sleeping outside expensive shopping malls and eating his smelly dirty dinner just outside most five star hotels in town, whichever he decides upon, each different day.It is bewildering how no one seems bothered by him, or rather, no one dares come over to him and say, "hey you super rag muffin! Get your smelly ass out of here!" Well, so this story is about fat madam Skunk who always had a great affinity for the most chocking perfumes just to overshadow her smelly thick sweat. So she owned this one star hotel. That's definately how she could afford them toxic perfumes, and am sure thats how her salary was used up, since am sure food was available in the hotels kitchen.They say she lived to eat rather than eat to live. So anyone stands justified to translate it literally. They say with money comes along pride. Well, for Skunky it was the other way round, she used to say that her pride brought her the money. Well, no one would pull a chair in her hotel or cough a waiter's name. Back then, Jonas was not into eating outside big hotels. That day he was actually just innocently passing by, outside the hotel, when she saw him. She had happened to be spying on some pretty handsome barber boy whose shop was opposite her hotel. Suddenly, she rushed out and rudely pushed Jonas about shouting insults at him. She had obviously pulled this move to win the barber boy's attention. Obviously, she had done her usual shouting professionally well enough and as expected a crowd had gathered around the duo. 'Her crowd' she thought. So wearing a scornful frown she went on casually spitting insults at Jonas. As the mad man people thought he was, he had assumed her insults and was laughing stupidly. Since she had stopped pushing him about, only but insulting,he had sank his right hand into his dirty sack as he went on laughing, yet seemed to be trying to pick something out. No one saw him pick it out. They only realized when his big dirty hand was already covering her mouth! Out of the black dirty suck, Jonas had grabbed out a handful of rotten spaghetti and before anyone could move their eyes to him,he had already forced it into her mouth. Next, her roughly tickled her making her swallow the entire rot! Then without a word, he picked his baggage and the crowd automatically gave way. Without a word, the people dispersed as madam Skunk was left frozen with her hand holding her throat, wishing she could rewind time.Since then, Madame Skunk has never been again. Jonas with his nearly acquired achievement thought it was time to upgrade. So he eats, unquestioned and undisturbed, his dirty food, outside any five star hotel her chooses.